Steps towards the mentality I need

Well... so far so good. Just finished a very nice supper, steak, veggies skewers of tomatoes, mushrooms, onions and green peppers done on the ol' charcoal grill and baked sweet potatoe... man, I forgot how good GOOD food can be. What was a pivotal moment for me was after the meal was complete, Dee had a nice dish of Ice Cream, and it was my FAVORITE ice cream EVER, and I didn't even feel a twinge of desire for it. I had a cup of coffee and that was it, enough for me. Whoooottt... I am actually very excited to be back on the wagon here.

I know its been only one week, not even really, but I feel incredible... energy levels are up, complexion is cleared right up, blood pressure seems to be coming down. I even had one of the ladies at our store ask me today if I had lost weight. Now I don't for one minute believe I have lost weight to the point where it can be noticed yet, but who knows, maybe I am carrying myself a little differently and that what she saw. Regardless, it felt good and was a nice bit of positive reinforcement for me.

So, I took a step today towards cleansing the mental blocks I had erected. I shaved my goatee away and freshly shaved my head. I love my goatee and it will be back, but I know I was using it as a mask as well, when you have a 5-6 inch goatee on your face it becomes peoples focal point, people see that before they see the cheeks or the jowels. It works as a sheild against reality and it needed to go. My 7 month old wasn't happy about it, he looked a little confused as he groped my face for his normal pull toy, but he got over it. Gabe, my ALMOST 5 year old ( yesh time flies ) asked me if I could stick it back on...lol...

Darlene has been amazing this week. She has been so supportive, she has asked a ton of questions about the foods I need, what would make it easier for me, etc. etc. Also, she has told me how proud she is of me every chance she can get, and that helps so much. She also has been sure to tell me she thought I was pretty sexy anyway lol, but hey, I know that she would rather take a streamlined model of me for a drive over the cube van I am now lol...

Well.. here's a pic of the two big reasons for me doing this, I know many of you know the boys already, but for those of you who don't, and for those of you visiting this blog for the first time, here are my boys.